I wasn’t quite clear about what was going on to start with (not sure I’m much clearer now), but I saw a sign and lo, I did chuckle at it. Even if the ‘God hates figs’ placard was initially somewhat startling.
I’ve been chortling away at various other signs as images surfaced on the t’Inter [...]
We were sitting in a very quiet pub early yesterday evening, waiting for some friends to meet us for a pre-curry drink, when a guy who was sitting at the other side of the room finally stopped having a loud, booming conversation into his mobile phone and started having a loud, booming conversation with his [...]
Small boy: Are we really looking for love?
His Mother: Yes we are.
Small boy: Where is it?
His Mother: We’ll have to find out.
Small boy: What does it look like? I don’t know what love looks like*. Are we really looking for love?
His Mother: Yes we’re really looking for love.
Much later, [...]
Small girl: What is it?
Mother: It’s called 216.5 degrees.
Small girl: What does that mean?
Mother: Well, a circle has 360 degrees, but this isn’t a whole circle. It’s just part of it.
There is a very long pause. The small girl puts on her best Deep Thought face and considers this information.
We heard someone shouting outside. There was a pause whilst Mr TLC and I exchanged surprised glances.
“I thought that was…”
“It can’t be, can it?”
It seemed so unlikely, but being a pair nosey chuffs we had to look. So we peered out of the window and there they were, a sight [...]
“I’m not selling anything,” said the man as he handed me a leaflet. About double glazing. From the firm with the most annoying advert ever. Not to mention the infamous reputation for notoriously crap customer service.
“Well,” I thought to myself, “Obviously his pants are on fire.”
Did he sense my disbelief? I doubt it, [...]
Our window cleaner is a bit accident prone. Which is rather ironic – I only decided that we needed a window cleaner because Mr TLC was making me feel very worried, he looked a bit off-balance whilst up a ladder. At least he looked a bit off-balance to me, he obviously felt perfectly fine. (I [...]
We had set off on the most mundane of errands. I needed new laces for my very old, worn and comfortable, but very cheap and fake, Timberland boots.
We were about 30 yards away when we spotted him. Everyone else was staring at the lights, waiting for the green man to light up, waiting for [...]
Whilst walking through Endcliffe Park today we saw a very frustrated toddler, who was on the verge of tears as he tried (unsuccessfully) to communicate something to his dad.
It made me remark that it was no wonder kids cry a lot, it must be incredibly difficult at that age, lacking the ability to express [...]
Apparently today is the day for popping the question to your man. I had forgotten about that particular tradition until I read a reminder in the paper yesterday.
It made me think about a couple who were regulars in a pub I used to work in years ago. They had been together for years, they [...]